I remember being highly offended during two different church services because of what was spoken over me by the visiting evangelist. One said that I would be a missionary to the world. That was enough to get my blood boiling. God knew I liked the coziness of my hometown and He certainly knew I would never step foot on an airplane. Oh no, ma’am. Not me.
I hear you laughing.
The second person spoke something over my life that, to me at the time, was even more offensive. She said in the kindest and most sincere way, that God was showing her all the creativity and ideas that surrounded me. She said it was beautiful and that God’s instructions to me were to write them down.
*gasp*
I went back to my chair and nearly cried knowing she couldn’t have possibly heard from God. The most creative thing I had ever done was assign names to my Barbie dolls and semi-coordinate clothing according to pictures I had found in magazines. Huh! “God said,” my foot. Who was this lady anyway?
I still hear you laughing.
Less than two years after my near nervous breakdown over prophetic words I realized that I could hear from God myself. It was a beautiful thing. At times He even allowed me to see things through His eyes. I saw the confused and hurt state of the women in our area and I felt burdened to help them; to minister to them. So, I prayed. He took me to some scriptures in Habakkuk.
This is the message that the prophet Habakkuk received from the LORD in a vision. How long, O LORD, must I call for help? But you do not listen! “Violence!” I cry, but you do not come to save. Must I forever see this sin and misery all around me? Wherever I look, I see destruction and violence. I am surrounded by people who love to argue and fight. The law has become paralyzed and useless, and there is no justice given in the courts. The wicked far outnumber the righteous, and justice is perverted with bribes and trickery. The LORD replied, “Look at the nations and be amazed! Watch and be astounded at what I will do! For I am doing something in your own day, something you wouldn’t believe even if someone told you about it.
Habakkuk 1:1-5
I have no idea what began to happen from that point on but life as I knew it had changed. No matter what I went through, or how much other women hurt me, I still continued to fight for them; to pray for them; to hope for them. God had answered my prayer and birthed a ministry into my spirit. The more I did unto Him and for them, the more He blessed me with ideas and creative ways to accomplish them. I began to write them down so that I would always know which direction to walk towards.
I will climb up into my watchtower now and wait to see what the LORD will say to me and how he will answer my complaint. Then the LORD said to me, “Write my answer in large, clear letters on a tablet, so that a runner can read it and tell everyone else. But these things I plan won’t happen right away. Slowly, steadily, surely, the time approaches when the vision will be fulfilled. If it seems slow, wait patiently, for it will surely take place. It will not be delayed.
Habakkuk 2:1-3
It has been a process that has lasted and will continue to last for many years. I know I have to be patient and wait on Him to reveal things to me in His time and I just walk in it for His glory. And just to prove Himself mightier than I, He made sure I got on a plane, not once, not twice, but many times since then and He showed me just how small my thinking was and He proved to me that His ways are not my ways. I am a missionary to the world. The runner of my message is the internet and it reaches across the boundaries of every country’s border. Can you believe that? Yeah, He must have gotten a good laugh at me. That’s okay though. I laugh with Him now.
You see, I think I got offended because I knew that God knew it wasn’t in me to accomplish the things that were prophesied to me way back when. It made me feel like either God didn’t really know me or that these people weren’t really hearing from Him. But, you see, He did know me. It was I who didn’t know Him. And something else I didn’t know at the time was that it wasn’t me who would bring these things forth and make it happen, it was Him. I simply had to walk in obedience toward the vision and on the path He laid out for me. I simply had to follow Him.
If you have loved and welcomed Christ as your savior then yes, there is a ministry inside of you. The more you get to know Him and wait on Him, the more He will reveal it to you. Just keep walking.
