Matthias is just not cooperating. I don’t know if he is spoiled or what could be going on. The doctor says he is normal but I have never had a baby act like this before.
For the last 2-3 weeks he is only happy when he is sleeping, eating, when someone is holding him up on the shoulder while walking or if he is in the stroller or car. That’s it. Otherwise he is crying. He stops crying the moment you pick him up. Then the moment you try to sit down he starts screaming again. I don’t have time to do anything and both Ryan’s and my back (& legs) have been in pain for almost two weeks from the constant walking – Matthias is getting heavy. It is taking a tole on us after almost three non-stop weeks of this. I am only writing this now because Maxon is holding him and pacing. I really don’t know what I’d do without Ryan and Maxon. They are such a big help with Matthias.
He doesn’t like his swing, bouncy chair, sling (he must be on the shoulder while being held), or the scoot scoot (walker). All he wants is to be held and walked.
Anyone else experience this? What did you do?
I don’t think I’d be much of a help in this area.
But if it is any consolation, Delaney cried all the time when she was baby. My parents laid her backwards (on her stomach) in her car seat. It’s a good thing they never got pulled over
I would just sit in the car and plug my ears, asking her to please stop crying (I was 3).
She eventually stopped crying
I’ll pray you get back to happy, smilie baby!
Wow! You got a lot of really great advice. My Ellie always wanted to be held up on my shoulder, especially when she was tired. We could not sit and rock her, but had to always walk her. I was just going to tell you I got really strong arms… though I can totally relate to being really worn out!
I’m sure someone else has already said this, but Andrew did the same exact thing. He was diagnosed with colic. Even the gas med. wasn’t working so they put him on some strong stuff. (narcotic)
Amy’ I could not keep down my mom’s breastmilk, nor could my sister. It is my belief it had something to do with teeth fillings and mercury in my mom, but it is a guess. I have never done well on much cow’s milk eiter. I was raised on soymilk because that solved my projectile vomiting with my mom’s milk and with cow milk substitute, but for my sister, projectile vomiting happened with cow formula, with my mom’s milk, and with soy formula. It was not til they put her on goat’s milk that she stopped vomitting and she still breaks out in itchy things when she eats things with added soy or uses soy based cleaners.
About the not stopping crying. Same with my son Jonathan.Feel blessed if the baby sleeps more than about 15 minutes at a time though. That is how he was. Slept 15 min, then up for about 3 hours day and night and a lot of crying even often when held.
He would do better when he learned to do something like roll over, or crawl, or stand, or sit. I think he always has wanted to be on the go and active and could not do that as a baby. He just had so much energy. I could calm him down long enough for me to get a bath by putting him in a swing because he would look up and watch and listen to the ratcheting noise and it would lull him to sleep long enough for me to get a break. There were times when I hit the wall instead of him, or called my mom in desperation to come and give me a bit of a break. My husband was here almost none and he was very little help through the night since he had to rise and go to work next am. Do remember that all of us are created unique. And things that we feel we can tolerate no more, will one day end. Just knowing the crying was not permanent helped.
Try another formula. Mean Johnson added more iron when my daughter was on it and we had to switch her to soy because the iron irritated her tummy too much and caused projectile vomiting.
Hold him while you can. They grow up so quickly. Count it a blessing as much as you can. See if you can find out why he is doing this. Maybe you have conditioned it by so much holding, and he has discovered if he cries he gets what he wants, your attention and cuddling.
HOPE SOME OF THIS WILL HELP. God bless you.
Hey there, Amy! My son was VERY high maintenance. He was only happy when held or in motion some way. Part of it was reflux and his sad tummy. But soy was a mistake for us. There was many a night that I slept on the couch at an angle with my babe asleep on my chest…45 degrees was a magic number for us!
Also, my son seemed to love motion (which sounds like Matthias in the stroller, car, and y’all walking him). I’m praying for you, hon!
Oh Amy – I feel for you! I know how this feels!
My 2nd daughter, Kaity, has always required *MORE* of everything than her big sister ever has. I used a sling and it helped A LOT. I highly recommend you try one. She still likes to be close and touching – and she just turned 3. She is sensitive to everything – moods, noise, light, environment – and sharp as a tack on top of it. She was a very fussy baby – on formula and only ONE kind worked. She still doesn’t sleep deeply and is very easily overstimulated.
Where our oldest daughter, Claira, thrived in a noisy environment with lots of people paying attention to her, Kaity was way overstimulated by it and would cry for hours after people would visit. It’s like her brain moves faster than her mind (if that makes sense) and she can’t process everything at once, even though she is very intelligent and communicates even better than her almost-5-year-old sister does.
I really attribute it to a highly sensitive, gentle “old soul” and while it has been challenging on every level, she’s a very unique little girl with some amazing gifts and talents. I couldn’t see this in the middle of no-sleep, spitting-up, constant-crying days – but I can now. She’s like a bright light from Heaven, and we have to tread gently where she is concerned. Even discipline is very different with her.
I second the Dr Sears’ recommendation. I thought something was wrong with Kaity (autism, serious sensory disorders, etc) until I visited his website and read what basically described my daughter to almost every detail! http://www.askdrsears.com/html/5/t050400.asp
We also began using sign language with her at about 6 months of age, and as she began to communicate both with sign, and later verbally, the stress lessened for her and she appeared to be less frustrated. She is still easily overwhelmed, but if I can ask her to TELL me what is wrong with words, that seems to help her. Again – it’s as if her brain worked faster than her body and she knew what was wrong, but couldn’t tell me.
It took a lot of patience. Still does. And it takes a lot of mommy breaks. And sleep. I was a crazy-zombie lady until I started sleeping all night – and then my ability to parent her improved greatly as she grew.
I don’t know if this helps at all – I just know how it feels and am praying for you!
My first was this way. I found that the miracle blanket was our only way to sooth him other than picking him up. I would wrap him TIGHT in the miracle blanket and then put him in his bouncy with the vibrator on. that would get cries initially but would stop within a few minutes. He loved it and often prefered to sleep that way.
First of all, ((hugs)) for you. I’ve walked this road before and it is not easy, as you very well know. My son had reflux and colic, so his first 5 months of life are somewhat a blur for me. Being a “rookie mom’, it really caused me to go through a very unhappy period myself, so please make sure you have a great support system (which it sounds as if you do!). Everyone has given excellent advice…we tried everything…swaddling, changing milk, reflux meds, etc. Nothing helped but time. I know that’s not what you want to hear, but even though it’s tough, it won’t last forever. Hang in there.
My 3rd was like this too. She was held more than the other two and was used to constant motion. She also didn’t have as regular of a schedule, because quite simply we couldn’t. She was a little spoiled, but it wasn’t on purpose. I think it’s part of being a 3rd child.
Not saying that’s what is up with baby Matthias by any means…but I wanted you to know I could relate. I had to let Allye lay in her crib and cry some to adjust to not being held all the time. It was a necessity as she got bigger cuz my back throbbed in pain. It took a few days of letting her cry (shriek, kick) more than normal, but she eventually adjusted. Bear in mind, she was about 9 months old when we did this…
Wish I could be there to help you. Would love to hold that precious thing and give you some rest.
Amy, this is so funny… my sister calls me daily with the very same complaint and I did not believe her till she came to spend a week with us….he is “spoiled” he wants to be held but does not like to be held while sitting still for too long lol. He will sit in the bouncy seat but only for 15 to 20 min max then wants to be held again. Babies want mama, I think it is partly a security thing. I second the wrap, I bought one for my sister so she could at least free up a hand while holding her chunky lil one. At this age the wrap will have a major learning curve, they will not like it at first but if you try for a while it may do the trick.
Sometimes they are just getting bored…
Have you tried a bouncy seat, swing, baby gym on the floor or play booster seat or saucer? The Bumbo is amazing too and you can set it anywhere, my babies watch me cook and move all around the place while they sit in a Bumbo.
Praying for you and sending hugs!!
P.S. I am volunteering my arms for relief, come over with Carsten for a day and I will gladly hold him the whole time you are here!! lol
Mostly everyone has said what I thought. I think looking into the GERDS is a good idea. I worked with a grandma whose soon had a condition where he would vomit and was fussing and not gaining weight. He had something wrong with his stomach that needed surgery. After that he was all better. I hope that you can find out what is his problem. I know that Nate is a momma’s boy maybe Matthias is too!
Hey sister girl!
Well, read all the above and praying for you right now…praying for me too — for God to give me wisdom on what to share with you; something that will bless you.
I had LOTS of trouble w/both my sons (now 17 and 15). My oldest had to have surgery to save his life when he was 2 1/2 weeks old. He had projectile vomiting. After 4 doctor’s visits, blood tests, 4 doctors, 2 nurses and a radiologist and a barium test, I was told I was a nervous new Mommy. As I prayed, I was sure, God gave me something He didn’t give the doctors…the wisdom to know something was wrong with my baby.
My favorite book at the time was “What to Expect When Your Expecting” and in it, it talked about something called pyloric stenosis. It normally develops after a baby is about 2 months old. My son had all the symptoms, although he was only 1 week old when it started. I finally threatened the doctors I wouldn’t leave their office until they could find what was wrong with my baby, convinced it was pyloric stenosis…they checked for it (felt his belly for a hard, almond-shaped cyst just below his belly button, projectile vomiting, jaundice and a barium test). They said all tests came back negative. Since I wouldn’t leave the office, they pleaded a nearby Pediatric Gastroenterologist (surgeon) to see me (it was 5 p.m. an I’d been at the Pediatric office since 11 a.m.). the Pediatric GI surgeon saw us. We brought the xray from the barium test and within 2 seconds he said:
“It’s a miracle your son is still alive. He’s got severe pyloric stenosis! He’s only got a ‘pen-thin line’ space for food to travel and he’s got the almond-shaped cyst below his belly button area! He has to have emergency surgery!”
My oldest son is now 17, a senior in High School, over 6′ and is as healthy as can be! All praise be to God!
I say all this, to suggest that you check to see if Matthias has these issues…he’s at the right age for a “normal” baby to have pyloric stenosis. And if he does, don’t’ worry, it is VERY easily fixed with surgery and he will never have problems again.
If this is not it, then he’s just a fussy baby who needs to be left alone to cry from time to time until he understands that crying doesn’t always get him what he wants.
But really sister, I think you should look into seeing if he has pyloric stenosis, especially if he has projectile vomiting. And yes, this really hurts our little guys and that’s why they need so much comforting…so do it…you’ll be so glad you did! ?
Love you and praying for you sister,
Sunny
I really have no advice other that the though of reflux. But I do want to let you know that I am praying for you and your family! Days like that seem like they never end and are hard on the whole family!
I haven’t read that. I’ll definitely have to check that book out from the library!
Thanks, Ginger!
That was Brooke. Have you ever read Dr. Sears’ book “The Fussy Baby?” I think he wrote it because of Brooke. ;^) We survived with a sling. You’re lucky – at least Matthias will let someone other than you hold him. Brooke wanted anyone as long as it was me. :^D
Hang in there, Amy. While it may not seem like it at the moment, these days will pass oh so quickly.
@Janet
Oh I love this! You are so right. When he is older he won’t want much to do with me. I know then that I’ll long for those days. I really appreciate the shift in the view of the bigger picture. I needed it.
What in the world is a Bumbo seat? I have never heard of that.
@ Joanne
I wonder if that security feeling does something for him too. I really want one of those Moby Wraps now. That really looks like exactly what we need.
Thanks Heidi…
Ryan and I both have GERD and two of my babies had it when they were younger but they didn’t require this “stand up and walk” thing. But… I really think it is possible that this is what Matthias has. We have been through the ringer with him as far as feeding goes. Because of my issues with delivery I had to be on two antibiotics, an anti-inflammatory, steroids, and pain relievers. Needless to say they wouldn’t let me put my breast milk within 10 foot of Matthias so they put him on formula. We were in the hospital for a while because both he and I had problems and while we were there the nurses noticed that he had projectile vomiting with every feeding. I still couldn’t give him my breastmilk (I was still pumping) so they put him on soy. Weeks later when I was able to give him breastmilk he started the projectile vomiting again. The doctor thought it was because maybe the meds they gave me were still in my system but I tried again a couple of weeks later and the same thing happened again. He could not have my breast milk. And I am very careful about what I eat because of my own GERD issues.
He is back on soy but that still causes him to spit up a lot. I’m going to take him back to the doctor. I’ve been giving him Mylanta (doctor’s orders) every 2-3 days when he is really showing signs of pain so I wonder if I should just give it to him more often. I hate doing that though.
*sigh*
I just want to fix it. I can’t stand to see my bebe cry.
Could it have to do with the feeling of “something” around him (whether it be skin, the side of the stroller or the carseat)? I don’t know, but I AM praying.
My youngest is only a month older than Matthias. I also never experienced this exact same situation before- new territory for us too! (Why my blog is lacking! lol)
The swing, walkers, exersaucers, etc. have not always been a hit in our home. In fact we refused to buy a swing this go round! lol But no bouncy seat? I thought our girl was the only baby in the world who didn’t like it! Because really, what baby doesn’t like their bouncy seat!?!?!?
I have determined hers to be a few things. Firstly she’s just a clingy baby- she likes to be held and hugged, and equally must have her hands holding something (my finger, edge of her bib, security blanket, etc.).
We also figured out, at almost exactly Matthias’s age, she thought she was a big girl and did not tolerate laying down. The Bumbo seat saved us!
I hate to admit it, but it’s tiring and frustrating to play “pass the baby” and not have the ability to do much of anything. But I keep reminding myself when she’s 15, she won’t want me to be in my arms and holding my finger all day.
My eldest boy was like this and he had reflux. We noticed it at 1.5 mos when he caught RSV but as he aged, it got worse and that burning sensation in the esophagus from what I hear is really quite painful. (eventually Dr did a ph probe and an upper GI and he had like 95 episodes in an 8 hr period with 4 being significant in causing choking. 95 times is a lot of stomach acid.) Being in an upright position 24/7 made all the difference. Thankful my kids liked the swing. That one child, slept in his swing for the first year at a 45 degree angle. Try having him sleep on a wedge and see if that helps. We did this our son, tummy down, and it made all the difference and he slept with me so I could watch him more closely for first two years. He lived with his reflux till he hit the age of 8 and it seems he has outgrown it but has a huge aversion to many foods (possible triggers)…not sure but.
My pediatrician says…MOM knows best!! If you think something isn’t right, stay on top of it and document the quirkiness or the episodes of what/when you think something is wrong. She strongly says, sometimes you just can’t give in and you really have to stay on top of it till someone listens. I kept a log book of life in a small spiral for my kids, temps, quirkiness, sleep patterns, fussiness, what they ate and when, bowel movements,….I even brought in a dirty diaper so the DR could see my concern on two of my kids…what it showed was allergy but at the time the Dr.s had no clue this was a sign of allergy.
Praying for clarity and direction!!
You know what? I’m checking out Moby Wraps right now. Does anyone else have experience with this product?
Oh, poor Mama. I’m so sorry. I’ve had one similar to that. Wore me out. On so many levels. But it passed eventually. Have you tried the Moby wrap? About $40, you can wrap him upright as high on you as you like (even skin to skin – shh, don’t tell anybody – you’ll be fully wrapped and people can’t see!) I had a friend once that used those huge Yoga balls to hold her baby upright while she bounced on it. All.the.time. Hang in there. Much love.
You know we thought about that but it doesn’t explain why he is okay in the car or when we are walking him in the stroller. It is strange. He just now finally went to sleep. I’m just not sure what the deal is.
Amy,
Do you think he is having stomach pains and when he is in certain positions he feels better? I know the doctor said he was fine, but maybe there is something they can’t see. Not something serious, but just plain ol’ tummy pain. I’m not sure if that helps, but it may be something to consider.